The shock of a weak vessel suddenly cracking in a daughter's brain, a daughter who has stayed with us by what seems like a thread.
Looking robust and rosy she hades a frailty masked by the emphasis on brittle bones.
Once again in the toilet, as on each previous occasion when my family have been in crisis, God and I had our usual open and frank discussion - not bargaining but the offer of my life, freely given, if that was what was needed to maintain the balance so essential to retaining the tension that holds life together.
Son-in-law and I cried, hugged, steadied each other as she disappeared into the theatre, shades of Craig's uber-marionettes.
Mad as it sounds, I was aware, on our way to and from the ward, of the sequence dance of the lift as dancers enter, leave and chassis back and forth, keeping out of each other's and the door's way.
In the intervening period we watched mind numbing dross on the cafe television and kept it together despite provocation.
Seven hours later we sighed with relief that she was awake and alive.
As we sat in the waiting area we were aware of another group, ashen and frozen, dealing with their own crisis and so tempered our euphoria.
The danger time wasn't past but the first hurdle was cleared.
Daughter's first comment on her condition was typically understated and concise - "I feel crap !"
We rejoiced that she could speak and her personality seemed intact.
The danger of spasm in the blood vessels of the brain, which could induce the effects of a stroke remained for the next twenty one days and I dare not relax. My life experience has tended towards it being dangerous. The moment I do seems to be the trigger for another crisis and more guilt so I only allow myself a controlled response.
In the following days she requested that all her hair be shaved off so that it could grow back at the same rate. She endured the removal of a legion of clips and contemplated the shaving of her legs and a pedicure as a high priority.
She continues to grapple with the tiredness that brings on slight aphasia and confusion, and an acceptance that for the next few months she has to step back, allow blood to be reabsorbed and let the healing happen.
Daughter and Son-in-law are blessed with a battalion of true friends who don't just say but do and a family who think the world of them both and two little girls with Grannies who support each other and love them unconditionally.
The shock, support, love and relief has girdled the earth and comeback ten fold.
Perhaps now my daughter will realise she doesn't have to be superwoman, is more than good enough as she is and is valued for herself.
